While in academia, I ate at my desk facing the computer, barely chewing my food nor tasting the flavors. Everything seemed so important and pressing. If I made time to experience lunch, I wouldn't get everything done. Yet I was perpetuating my own busyness, removing my choices. And in that process, I lost connection with myself.
It's common to feel we're "on our way" to something else, even as we're in the here and now. Eating a meal can feel this way. But meals provide a gentle and needed space. Here's a counter-culture approach to food: close your eyes for 30 seconds, pay attention to your breath, be in your body; look at your food, take in the colors; smell your food, breathe in the aroma; taste and fully chew your food. I know this might sound radical. (I don't have time for this nonsense, there's more important things to do.). Here's a key ingredient: put down your silverware (or your food), let go, between bites; between every bite. This act, in itself, will slow your pace. Even if your mind races and you quickly anticipate the next bite, there's a bit of space. You can notice your reactions. If you're with other people, you can give them your full attention. Look them in the eye. (Or, if alone, look inward at yourself.)
Give yourself this gift: put down the silverware, release your grip. Make space to savor your meal--even if in small ways. It helps your digestion, but more importantly it helps you connect with others and reconnect with yourself. (I'm with you on this journey, still practicing and starting anew each day.)
I recently thought I would try this for a February challenge but thought it was weird since all my meals are alone. I definitely rush through meals (unless I'm with you) and eat at my desk. Thanks for the reminder (and nudge) that it's okay to do it even if you are alone.
ReplyDeletethere are two scenarios where i rush: when i'm with a group that has big energy and when i'm alone. the former is because there's too much stimulation and the latter is because there's not enough (so i must really sit with myself while in the act of eating). in both cases, if i take a few breaths and purposefully slow down, the meal becomes more pleasant. sometimes, if i eat dinner alone, i light the candles. your company is delightful, steph. trust me. :)
Deletebeautiful reminder from a wise friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you. Lovely portrait of you too!
your friend
tracie
thank you, tracie! it's always good to hear from you.
DeleteI really needed this today. I eat alone a lot now days and I always do it with a book, or with my computer. It is mindless eating for sure. This month I am going to try this. I might have to come back daily to read this, but I am going to try it. Thank you Joy, you always open my mind. xoox
ReplyDeletecathy, i understand the pull to distraction (e.g., reading) when eating alone. i've been practicing with this--being present with just myself and the food. and i realize when I don't do this, i minimize my relationship with myself. why not have a date with myself, enjoying my own company? it's a form of self-nurture.
Deletehugs to you!
When I did the mindfulness course back in the autumn, I reflected on how I am always telling my girls to hurry up and eat their dinner, and that I would mindfully not do that any more! ( oh my goodness dinner is a very slow affair here!!) Well as always thanks for the reminder Joy!!! I am now setting the intention to eat slowly and mindfully and let them do the same!!! Debs x
ReplyDeletehappy sigh. family dinner as a slow affair. what a wonderful new tradition.
DeleteI lost connection with myself long time ago Joy. I'm so much struggling with that now. Your reminder is so important. Thank you so much!
ReplyDeletebut you know what, agnes? you noticed. you see how you lost connection. that's a BIG step. that's worthy of a little happy dance. the practice of re-connecting is difficult but you know its worthwhile. each day, you can begin again (and again and again). hugs to you!
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