Getting Out of My Head

Yesterday began in the normal Sunday way: I steeped tea and chopped veggies, Mark made biscuits, we created egg-veggie mixtures, and ate outside. We talked about ideas, food, and the wildlife around us.

Then I got into my head. I tinkered with a recent essay. I worried that it would be rejected. I obsessed about my author bio (in the small chance the essay is accepted): Joy Jordan is a former professor of statistics who now obsesses about writing an unassailable personal essay. My mind was full of thoughts. But not productive thoughts.

I recognized the unproductive nature of my thinking. And so did Mark ("perhaps writing a new essay would be better than worrying this one to death"). So we went for a walk. We walked to the student-run organic garden on campus; we walked to the local urban farm. We surrounded ourselves with wild nourishment. It was a wonderful antidote to my obsessive thinking.

There are different whats about which I can endlessly think--work, plans, projects, rumination on past events, daydreams of life all-wrapped-up. When I'm unproductively in my head, I need to 1) sink into my heart and listen, or 2) move my body--get outside and get some perspective. Yesterday I did the latter. I walked for hours, connected with nature, investigated spaces, witnessed parties on people's lawns--I got outside all the thoughts in my head. And there's so much life out there: so much life to be experienced.