April 9, 2014

Always Share the Happy Thoughts

Imagine you're having a conversation with a friend. And the discussion leads to an insight about another person--a kind act you witnessed, a positive change you noticed, a brave step you saw. It's easy to gloss over this experience, because that particular person isn't with you. Yet this happy thought is worth sharing. What if we remembered these happy thoughts--maybe wrote them down. And then made a point to share that positive moment with the other person (e.g., spouse, child, coworker, or friend).

We often protect our hearts from hurt. Interestingly, not sharing the good thoughts is a form of protection. What if I tell this person the positive change I noticed and he thinks I'm weird or she makes fun of my pollyannaish-ness? I'd like to share the good with this person, but that's just not how our relationship works. These are all forms of protection. Yet they also shield our hearts from gratitude and love. They constrict rather than expand.

Given the uncertainty of life, it's important to tell people what they mean to us. It's important to share the happy thoughts, listen to the difficult, and treat ourselves and others with kindness. There's no need to hold back the joy, love, and gratitude. If you realize something good about another--even the smallest thing--share it. Tell them. Kindness is contagious.


  1. What a great message Joy. One I need to practice more of for sure. xox

  2. Giving and receiving compliments are still sort of taboo in western society: one hesitates to give them, one doesn't know how to react when given one ... Yet, it can lift one's spirit, for both the giver and the beholder. It's all about vulnerability ... Thank you for showing us the way, dear Joy! Much love and thank you so much for being the beautiful soul and woman you are ...